yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
so i wake up and the chick who i had sex last night left her phone number. next to the number was a broken condom. should i call?
I am going to get arrested. I am yelling fuck repeatedly, wearing a Bird jersey and polka dot pants while pounding wine. Amazing mug shot to follow.
We'll probably be arrested for having a cheetah in our apartment anyway, so I say go for it.
He went into the alley to piss and came back a minute later with a case of Bud Select. I'm speechless.
pre-gaming in the library. just gonna keep going until i'm too drunk to keep working and then i'll be there.
did i paint my nails blue or do i need to make a trip to the ER?
Bro, there is a rent-a-cop selling syringes out of the trunk of his car. This is why I hate the DMV.
Who would've thought that Monopoly night would've ended with some girl peeing on the couch.
I woke up on a navy base in a different time zone. I'm never leaving tallahassee again.
my mom snuck into my room, washed her clothes and made her breakfast. what the fuck she's a better boyfriend than I am
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
I’m at the Eye doc, sitting in the waiting room. The woman next to me is highlighting passages in her bible. I’m watching pornhub on mute. I clearly need some penis, or Jesus.
i just wanted have a romantic star gaze moment with him. untill he let out a massive fart.
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