I was staring at you from my window across the quad. I wanted to let you know so it's not creepy
oh well we may not be friends on facebook but at least i got laid
There's a girl n class drinking wine out of a taco bell cup. I can smell it.. it's totally reisling. JEALOUS.
my dad brought home flowers.. so i started talking to them
at the gym hungover with vodka in a water bottle. don't say i'm not fulfilling my resolutions
your ability to fuck hot guys even when you go out in sweats amazes me
the best sex is "duke just lost" sex.
I feel like all of the victims from Seven. Best birthday weekend ever.
Just sucked some sandy dick on a boardwalk & now I'm at a family reunion hbu
Yeah, I'm just gonna try to repress that and remember him for his big dick and perfect jawline.
Make me food? I don't want to be a science experiment. I'm dunk. Holy shit. Drunk*. Let's do science.
I planned to shave today but it's Friday the 13th I might cut something
I need to stop waking up with no pants on.
what happened this time
I dont know everyone was gone and there was a bird in the room
You made me brush your teeth last night......for 47 minutes.
Yeah. I fucked her boyfriend, she knows, and she still wants to keep dating him. That's love.
Randomize