Joe is a total sociopath, I'm going to hook up with him tonight
it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
Don't leave without me in the morning. I keep scaring everyone cause I'm sleeping in the bathtub.
I literally saw him try to open a beer can with his anus. We need o step up our game.
hooked up with the gay kid & his friend's mom told me "you know he has a identical twin brother whose straight, right?"
How do I politely say my vagina is not a chew toy and if you bite me again I will slap you?
You could say take it easy, whoa there, be gentle, anything that doesn't fully convey the horror.
there is nothing ok with the fact that that was the 4th time i peed in the same parking ramp
I am gifting my birthday sex to you, but its okay because I can always just have birthday vibrator.
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
You need to stop thinking about the needs of your vagina and concentrate on the greater good
exhale infront of a fan. self shotgun.
I keep picking up boring men who literally just want to cuddle. HOW AM I THIS BAD AT GETTING SEX?
This is why you have to watch more Zombie movies- to prepare for End Times...
I swear we were drugged last night
We had a 130$ tab bitch. We drugged ourselves.
Randomize
