it wasn't THAT bad but he definitely called his dick an asshole and said sorry to my vagina
Yeah getting kicked out of the bar at 1 pm really set the tone for the day.
Apparently my downstairs neighbors don't much appreciate it when I do drunk aerobics at 3am on a Wednesday...
So I paid for the taxi using pennies and hair clips, no need to thank me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
do you know where my other puke covered boot is
If I win the lottery I'm going to hire someone to skywrite "FUCKTARD" over his house. That much anger.
No more pre-dentist shots, I just puked on my hygienist
Pretty sure I got pink eye from the strip club. There is also still beer cans rattling around in my shower.
He and his ex stood there talking about going to get Chinese food while I was half naked searching for my panties
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh god establish a safe word
I'm going to! Pineapple.
WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED. WHO CAME HOME WITH ME. WHAT THE FUCK RESPOND ASAP I AM SO CONFUSED
The room got awkwardly silent right as i yelled "leave him alone! I know plenty of straight guys who like to suck dick!"
I'm hungover and in a fort. And I hate you.
So many questions
hey, just so we're clear, next time we go swimming drunk at my house, we have to use the floating chairs instead of my mattress. i'm not sure how to get it out of the pool.
I have to touch the horse lube. :-(
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