D3 body, D1 cock
Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
Last night is one of those stories you hear about on 20/20 right after they make a law banning 90% if what I did.
His second form of ID was an emergency room wristband from an hour ago. What the fuck is going on right now
Haha yeah he had an allergic reaction to the alcohol earlier. He thinks that if he only drinks vodka he will be ok...
i just unblacked out cuddled in a pita pit booth with ten dollars rubberbanded to my hand.
i think maybe i'll just not watch it. i'd rather not think of you as a magical transforming set of dick holes.
Can we please get on skype for like 20 seconds so i can show you my penis and the spiderman temporary tattoo that is right above it
Which outfit says "I'm sorry for your loss but we're still banging later"?
you ate the make a wish sign. Like actually chewed on it. It was our solution to going outside when the cops were there
I want to name my colorful bowl Batman. Why? I still have yet to figure it out. But I'm calling it Batman.
I arrived home at 7am wearing nothing but my underwear and a fedora. I ate half a dozen deviled eggs. Put Katy Perry on repeat. And cried myself to sleep. We cannot go out on Thursday anymore
Just want to let you know thanks for setting the bar pretty low when it comes to girls.
Life's hard when you can't differentiate between retrograde and PMS
He showed up in a Prius. I didn’t even wanna.... So I left.
Randomize
