Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
Omg!!!! Call me in the morning I just saw A stripper queef out a dollar
a small fire erupted but we put it out with a can of beer so everything's fine
You said that you were drinking out of a pan, and then went on to apologise to 'Jesus and all the other guys' for drinking on a Sunday.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I fucked her. If you're keeping score at home, it's all tied up with horrible sex with someone I like and great sex with someone I hate both with 1.
Haha yeah my head's fine..sorry about the dent in your fridge.
Calm the fuck down fatty, you can add creme de menthe to a vanilla shake any time of the year
why is there blood on my car? and are we still friends?
We can stop fighting if you send me a picture of your dick standing at full attention wearing a sock.
I'll wait.
It can also be a hat.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Then he said,"I love you like a sister I like to have sex with."
Your final is gonna be as easy for you as getting into straight girls' pants is for me.
What kind of terrible faithless God would allow vodka and one ply toilet paper to coexist?
What's the polite way to say "hey I don't actually want to fuck you, I just swiped right on you because you didn't like me in high school and I needed validation"
So you can text and rub it at the same time? Bravo.
I can do anything and masturbate, if I truly wanted to.
you walked 30 min all the way back to the dorms at 2am?
i was more bummed that i dropped all my skittles.
Randomize