He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
At one point during the moaning he reminded me of Forrest Gump
We can get Dustin to help us. I think he'd be good at luring girls into a dark alley.
You told me to hold on because you had to barf like a dinosaur.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Thanks for putting the blue stuff in the toilet, it made me throwing up this morning more enjoyable.
So "Abstinence August" was a bust. Maybe I'll try for "Sex-free September" or "Only if we're facebook official October"
why is my new profile picture on Facebook one of me with a bunch of strangers on an elevator?
I want him to rummage through my vagina. with unwashed hands.
I am seriously only coming over if there are McNuggets. I want 10 bitch. Honey mustard.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hung out near hay bales in sweaters then she gave me a pumpkin spice pop rocks bj. That was so freakin' seasonal.
I had fresh baked oatmeal cookies, tacos AND was on deck to give a stellar blow job. You'd think that'd be a win/win/win situation.
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
I don't know what that means. Any of it. BUT I will be at your house at 10:20 and you better be ready to get high as balls.
you know you’re single when you try to cook yourself a nice pasta dinner but you’re too weak to open the container of sauce and theres no one around to help you
Yeah. 11 people shoved in a clown car for a 1 hour party. I'm too old for house parties.
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