i can juggle bunnies
cool
on fire
That's what happens when you park you car under a perfectly good balchony I can puke off of
I mean, once you get beat with a dildo you can't look at someone the same
I have yet found the courage to put pants on. No judgement thursday led to no shower friday and now no pants saturday. God i miss college.
The only thought that went through my head was "that would be an absolute disaster" so of course I said yes
Hypothetical Question: Would you take a cougar bullet for me?
I text him "Dude. Tryna get fucked here. I only have half the parts. I need your help" I'm sure my mom would be super proud of the woman I have become.
If we can't get laid at a bar crawl, we should just quit life.
My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
I mean it's a good blow job, but it's not worth the four hour round trip.
Sunday mornings are confusing. Like. I can't decide if I want to go for a run or start drinking
i got a dick pic last night and the mother fucker had a Jesus picture in the background.
Heading there now. Already have a boner.
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
Randomize
