are you going to last longer than 15 seconds
nope
do you ever think like no deep thought could take place in the spanish language? like all they talk about is like tacos?
how high are you?
We aren't going to mix hockey and sex texts tonight.
I totally agree. all sexting is on hold till after the games over.
Playoffs. This shit is serious.
He has to watch his girlfriends kitten. Even when she is in Vegas, her pussy keeps him from getting into mine.
He gave me an elaborately handwritten invite (on a bar coaster) back to his place and whispered in my ear 'i have ping pong'. And he said byob. fuck THAT.
nah i think i'm gonna take my landlord's kids trick-or-treating instead. apparently the houses around here hand out wine to the adults and candy to the kids.
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
1 tequila 2 tequila 3 tequila, floor.
*roof
I just rolled an Obama blunt and a Romney shame joint for tonight. Vote wisely.
He broke into my house just to tell me the door was locked.
Strip clubs just aren't as fun when a man tries to drunkenly grind on you.
Only my second night back in town and I already have drunk middle aged women doing the robot around me in a circle.
Today one of my patients offered me pot brownies. Medical school worth it. Living the dream.
I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but yours is no longer the biggest penis I've seen. It is however, still the prettiest.
he's such a nice guy...he deserves a bigger dick.
Randomize
