Did you ever notice that cashews look like fetuses?
whats the weirdest thing you ever masturbated to?
King Triton
the toilet has never flushed louder then when you sneak home drunk and try to avoid your parents hearing you puke.
Don't say that out loud. People might think I really like to pee on you.
Of course you don't like it. I am the one who likes it.
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
I am far too hungover to deal with the fact I can hear you masturbating in the bathroom.
He walked away from the girl that just blew him to hook up with another girl, and when she got pissed he just turned around and screamed, "SHE IS LIKE 10X HOTTER THAN YOU!" Then she went on an angry dick sucking rampage. There were 4 victims.
I drew you a picture of Jesus holding hands with Frida Kahlo as a token of my gratitude
Let me get this straight, you're telling me to lower my standards? Even though last week you told me I don't have any..?
Due to this morning's events my new porn name is Reepa Nipplov.
I'm storing dick pics, so basically if I'm still single after residency...ur gonna get bombarded. It's gonna be a blizzard of dicks.
Feel free to keep your blizzard of dicks to yourself.
I like the new guy, he keeps beer in the fridge.
I basically go to him for great dick and great memes.
How drunk were you? in an effort to seduce him, you demonstrated your lap dance skillz on his dog.
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
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