Her vagina smelled like hockey gear.
maybe you should start leaving anonymous bottles of booze on his doorstep with love notes attatched. that always gets me.
so. which one of us is going to pay for the neighbors new window? it cracked when i threw the bottle at it but smashed when you threw yours.
woman puking in liquor store parking lot at 9:30 on a tuesday morning = best commute ever.
whatever it's my dick and i'll put it wherever i want
he said i looked like a lion with slutty lingerie on .
She put up a picture of her grandmother on facebook, looks like the lazy eye runs in the family
Please tell me you're throwing the cats into this foot of snow.
Hate is such a strong word! I prefer to think that you strongly dislike me due to the honesty I show towards your routine shortcomings of success in life.
Pretty sure the purpose of joining wine clubs isn't to drink the 2 bottles they send you each month IN THE SAME NIGHT.
I wonder what blackout Alex would think of her?
probably "functioning vagina, must touch"
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
Finally hooked up with her. She bought me tacos after because "she can do better in a bed". You're gonna be my best man.
Go makeout with Mickey Mouse so we can get FastPass tickets
So if i am talking to a guy and he sends me a pic and he is wearing Spiderman button down dress shirt.... Is it ok if i dont want to talk to him anymore?
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