Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
I would get the one fuckin stripper that's a lesbian. THE ONLY ONE
The bartender laughed but the manager kicked me out when the mom conplained. There's no way my fart harmed that baby in any way
I just found out I lost my virginity the same day my parents did, 25 years later. This is my life.
I only want to make out with him. Unless I get hungry. In that case I will take him home and screw him as a distraction from eating.
other than the jail part I had a really good time with you
that man is just a bundle of powerful magic and poor judgment
I just sugar scrubbed my vagina. If I don't get laid tonight, me and the universe are gonna have some problems.
My tits became the mascot for the SAE house last night.
Tinder date just called. I was supposed to be there 30 minutes ago but I'm on a 27 game win streak in Park...?
Fuck that man! Tell her your dog died or something. Reschedule that shit, you can't stop 2K at a time like that. Ball is life bro... Priorities.
DESTROY DICK DECEMBER\nTHE SUN SHINES ON THE THIRSTY
One lesson I've learned so far from college: You've always got time for one more shot. Always
She puked on the floor because she said she really liked to clean.
She asked me to tell her the three words every girl wants to hear so I whispered "I play hockey" in her ear.
Randomize
