She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
he kept asking me "do you love it? tell me you love it" as I was riding him.
and...?
I told him it was alright.
I'm in the library if you wanna come give me library head.
I just want you to know IcyHot in the ear is weird. Don't ask.
He has horses apparently. I wonder if we could fuck while riding a horse or if that's too dangerous.
OH MY GOD I JUST WANT TO GO HOME AND FART ALL NIGHT.
wait can you just like go into detail with this penis touching thing? like was it a hand job or was it like a day at the petting zoo or something
Only I could get hit on by homophobic straight guys in a drag bar.
and if planning a fake elopement keeps me from fucking strangers and doing drugs, i think it's good for me
He told me I'm a small core of pure evil wrapped up in sweetness, gold, and puppies. He gets me.
That is beautiful
I'm shaving my vagina to the lion king soundtrack. How's your 9am?
Do you know anyone else that comes home with unexplainable injuries as many nights a week as we do?
I'm both gender and math confused
I woke up and saw that my last google search was "Bacon neck".
He heard our neighbor’s vibrator through the wall, knocked on her door and now they’re doing it
The blonde?!? That’s just unfair! His penis already has a fairy tale existence
Randomize