did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.
For Halloween this year I'm gonna go as Angelina from Jersey Shore. I'm gonna yell "umm HELLO?!," cockblock someone, then leave the party early
promise me that when we are 32, we will look nothing like Kim Zolciak. Promise me right this instant.
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I have no recollection of sleep choking you
i think that after ALREADY drinking that much, the tube shots may have been a bad idea.. i mean afterall, i did wake up and find my cell phone IN the bonfire the next morning.
Its not personal, its just business. I'm the Donald Trump of blowjobs.
She just pulled out a chicken strip and a hundred dollar bill from her purse. This is a legit twentyfirst bday weekend.
So some sort of safe sex group just flash mobbed the bar by putting condoms over people's beers.
They left screaming as a hale of lubbed up condoms rained into their hair.
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Next sat night Titanic party. Bring your floaties, trashy necklaces, and a large lung capacity. This ship is going downnnnnnn.
Would it be appropriate to cancel a hookup to watch the golden globes?
absolutely. tina fey and amy poehler trump everything.
I showed him my toy collection and he goes, "You won't need those anymore," and dropped his pants. I threw the House of Pleasure out last night.
Firstly: alligator costume is happening anyway. But I'll see what I can do about the balls.
So his dick was definitely bigger than it looked in all the pictures he sent my daughter.
I serenaded the cat in the hat for a few 90s songs but idk who he is
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