Wearing these hooker shoes was a mistake
Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
Sometimes to bang a cougar u gotta play wii With her kids
He told me he finished so fast because he's a sprinter. I hate athletes who are really just pussies.
and you're not allowed to put a penis in you if it's attached to a 26 year old who works at blockbuster
I've developed breathing exercises to keep myself from puking..
I'm pretty sure I just had a convo with my hot pockets about how they weren't good enough for the oven.
I bet he'd be real motivational during sex. And he'd probably make you call him superman.
You Just stopped dancing, looked at me and said "I'm gonna make it rain" Then shook the open box of crunch berries everywhere.
Dude where are you? I've been here an hour and all I've done is get head from a random in the stairwell.
It could happen. I haven't creeped the rest of the guest list yet.
Just creeped. Everyone is a passable 7. Orgy is a go!
I am in serious pain and you're making dick jokes. I hope you wind up with crotch rot.
I don't think he understands that his kid doesn't bother me. I have a binder full of developmentally appropriate early childhood activities.
Either go for divorced men who are forty plus or stop doing this immediately. You are 23 years old. You need more wine and less baby fever
I hate how she's getting mean with age
Meh, you can't hate. That's our basic life goal and you know it.
I found out he hated a girl that I hate so I fucked him. My reasons for fucking guys are getting bad.
Randomize
