I'd wear matching sweaters with you
She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
i love beer. I convinced myself that I'm going to ace the exam tomorrow. I can't even do that when I actually study.
Today I learned you can't titshake with a corset on.
We found her in the fireplace eating dog biscuits.
No. My vagina is not the scapegoat for your poor decisions.
I bought a sword. Make the proper arrangements.
There's holes in the drywall and the beer pong table is a broken door on two barstools. You know they like to party.
sometimes when you're high at work you just have to say fuck it and eat the dog treats
I was the girl at the bar last night passing out free condoms and making sure everyone knew how to use them to keep the population down
How do you explain to a guy that he's like a little puppy dog that you play with, but then leave at the shelter to go home to your German Shepard?
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
At least your road beer policy is responsible. Well, relatively speaking.
You are cordially invited to the annual finals week stress relief drinking binge at our manor this evening
i just want to die with dignity and clean teeth, is that too much to ask?
Randomize
