he screamed my twitter name while we were having sex.
so the time management class we had to take for work seems to be working. I just beat off instead of waiting for gf to get home bc it fit my schedule better.
He just called shotgun on the way to the squad car.
The panties match.
I'll be right there.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Will you come get her? She's trying to get the pizza guy into the bathtub.
At what point should i just give my brother a break and stop sleeping with his friends?
oh sorry. I thought "boat" was code for "penis"
Literally lying on a futon being hand fed bacon
Fuck you.
I just feel like you're using me for sex.
I'm glad you finally understand the context of our relationship
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
who's idea was it to start the NCAA tournament less than a week after St. Patrick's day? My liver needs time to recover for things like this.
By the way I got my period today. No NHL babies for me.
I've been on the toilet for an hour. On a six day bender. My ass feels like its leaking vodka
she wanted me to tie her up with my playstation charger cord. i kept on hoping she wasn't a squirter. those cords r expensive. could have def been a Sony commercial tho
My parents get here at 6 so I have to make it look like a sober virgin lives in my room by 5.
The guy whose house were at is drunkenly reading green eggs and ham to us in German
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