May have finally hit rock bottom...bouncer from the strip club informed me I wore the same shirt last night
i threw up on the blunt... he was pissed.
we thought you were sober enough for a movie but you took one look at emily blunt and screamed "aw this bitch?!" and passed out 30 seconds later
I've realized that you're the only friend i can rely on to drink with me any given day. i thank you for that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Made it home ok. Only got hit by one car.
Dude, you need to understand there is a fine line between "guilty pleasure" and in the closet gay
I don't know if I want to cry scream puke or go somewhere and drink more. This is such a weird emotion.
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
I was riding her and she yelled "fuck me" then someone in the room next door yelled "you don't have to say it if youre doing it."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you were making out with a guy that looked like Fat Albert, I kicked you in the vagina but you didn't stop
And we're now at 8 people from the office coming to my desk to ask me "do you feel better?".
Our house rule in beer pong, is that if you get the ball in the bitch cup.... you have to snapchat your balls to everyone on your friends list.
I let my daughters ex boyfriend take me home from the bar. Hey, at least he's old enough to drink
Think of the things uve done in the past. And ask urself "have I done worse?" If u answer yes. Its perfectly ok.
Turns out naked twister is less fun than it sounds. I can never look Lee in the eye again. But Aimee's boobs are glorious.
Randomize