How do you get a cum stain out of a trampoline?
i purposely bought her a small sweater. My way of saying, you've gotten fat.
can't wait for January to be Over so I don't have to see all the fat resolutionists working out.
She went off on a twilight/new moon tangent before we even got back to my room. i had to jump the ship and pretended to pass out on the sidewalk.
I don't really want to explain to you right now but i just ate laundry detergent
You can't see him, he's in front of the dildo, but Amelia Earhart is blocking your view.
I drank half a bottle of wine while watching the Olympics opening ceremonies. I catcalled at handsome athletes. Stop me.
If we laid all the dicks that's have been inside of us end to end it would be as tall as 4 story building. 40 feet of dicks.
IT'S A FUCKING GIANT POKEBALL MAD OUT OF TINY ROSES
Saying you need a hooker then asking me to have sex is NOT the way to get laid. Booty call 101.
He said he didnt want to choke me, I said im sorry thats a deal breaker.
Just witnessed some guy throw his fake eye at his dad's face. Actually, he whipped it at him.
No idea but I'm preparing for 4 tequila shots and tons of vomit
Awake! can you bring me my pants...im under the couch
last night I used snow as a chaser
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