Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
so i told my doctor my symptons and she just shook her head at me
I've spent too much of my life staring at my bberry and counting to 5 to see if it blinks
Lady GaGa only went backwards in convincing me she's not a man at the VMAs.
just prayed to lady gaga in hopes it will help me pass my fashion merchandising final...what is my life?
I just fell down my stairs. I know that you are 6 hours away but please come pick me up. I promise I will still be here on the stairs.
I'm genuinely dissapointed that we didn't make any fat chicks cry
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
Now I know he's not trying to fuck me. He took me to lunch at White Castle.
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
blowjobs from left handed girls are noticably better than from righties. these are the most important things I've learned this semester
It's a little sad/awesome that I scored coke within 60 seconds of walking in the bar.
The student becomes the teacher.
The tequila monkeys have a drum solo in my skull right now. I can't imagine Emily feels better.
I just want to sit in my tub, drugged out of my mind, and watch the green lantern cartoon while the world as we know it ceases to exist outside my bathroom door, Okay? Is that REALLY too much to ask?
Your the only girl I know that carries a $1100 purse with tater tots inside
Randomize
