I may or may not have just irish jigged at a bar. And broken out in a sweat from it. Not a good sign for that marathon yo.
I'm gonna write a book, Things that go bump in the night: The story of Katelyn. Chapter one, my roommate is a dumb whore.
I woke up to a bunch of college seniors jacking off a horse in my face. Geuss who didnt move in time?
you probably should not have drank the wine that everyone spits out. and the sad part, that was not even your low point last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sex should be hot, sweaty, messy, and a little painful. At no point should it involve tiny rocks
Holy shit. Do you realize what this means? Officially all of my ex-bfs are either dead or gay
I should have to wear a sign around the rest of the day so everyone knows the shame I feel.
Is your answer to that text seriously a right parenthesis
To my wonderful winter break booty calls: thank you for making this holiday season enjoyable. I look forward to seeing you boys again this summer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was to tired to jerk him off, so he made me hold it while he thrusted into my hand.
As we're eating sushi she goes I just want to get a disease so my mom can take care of me... Great first date
shes wearing an ankle tracker so she should be easy to find
He said he wanted to start giving out "sex souvenirs". I got a poster with a penguin on it.
Jk probs not coming. Tequila
Who brings nunchucks to a funeral?
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