Texts From Last Night

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  (828): View more from North Carolina

  God. I look like such a fucking stand up guy wearing polo shirts. You would totally trust me not to date rape you.

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  (828): God. I look like such a fucking stand up guy wearing polo shirts. You would totally trust me not to date rape you. http://tfl.nu/4g7v
  Replies (25) Good night (3623) Bad night (1052)
• Favorite

  (617): View more from Massachusetts

  This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.

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  (617): This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us. http://tfl.nu/j1fo
  Replies (11) Good night (2203) Bad night (864)
• Favorite

  (513): View more from Ohio

  She was walking with the authority that 2 beers gave to a light weight.

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  (513): She was walking with the authority that 2 beers gave to a light weight. http://tfl.nu/4s7r
  Replies (21) Good night (3483) Bad night (766)
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  (626): View more from California

  it was like eating out sand paper

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  (626): it was like eating out sand paper http://tfl.nu/u8qd
  Replies (32) Good night (673) Bad night (7886)
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  (517): View more from Michigan

  Just saw Youth in Revolt. There are only so many times Michael Cera can lose his virginity.

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  (517): Just saw Youth in Revolt. There are only so many times Michael Cera can lose his virginity. http://tfl.nu/x1wn
  Replies (25) Good night (4438) Bad night (1672)
• Favorite

  (716): View more from New York

  The port-a-pottys are knocked over so I have nowhere to sleep.

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  (716): The port-a-pottys are knocked over so I have nowhere to sleep. http://tfl.nu/clzh
  Replies (4) Good night (1294) Bad night (3488)
• Favorite

  (423): View more from Tennessee

  Depending upon how the Sox game progresses, I'll either cry on the bar or fuck someone tonight...

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  (423): Depending upon how the Sox game progresses, I'll either cry on the bar or fuck someone tonight... http://tfl.nu/fo5y
  Replies (11) Good night (1617) Bad night (838)
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  (704): View more from North Carolina

  Besides asking our teacher if he enjoyed being fisted did I have any other tragic moments last night?

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  (704): Besides asking our teacher if he enjoyed being fisted did I have any other tragic moments last night? http://tfl.nu/zhm8
  Replies (6) Good night (929) Bad night (2044)
• Favorite

  (269): View more from Michigan

  I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class

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  (269): I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class http://tfl.nu/65qj
  Replies (7) Good night (2650) Bad night (703)
• Favorite

  (970): View more from Colorado

  I just wish I could congratulate your tits on how much I love seeing them

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  (970): I just wish I could congratulate your tits on how much I love seeing them http://tfl.nu/6llp
  Replies (9) Good night (1822) Bad night (516)
• Favorite

  (613): View more from Ontario

  The people at subway are so judgy when you stop to get a sandwhich on your walk of shame

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  (613): The people at subway are so judgy when you stop to get a sandwhich on your walk of shame http://tfl.nu/x5yp
  Replies (4) Good night (698) Bad night (367)
• Favorite

  (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  Now I just sit back and wait to give ass birth to pure evil.

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  (412): Now I just sit back and wait to give ass birth to pure evil. http://tfl.nu/nc46
  Replies (7) Good night (317) Bad night (624)
• Favorite

  (518): View more from New York

  currently working on a look that screams, "I'm dead inside, but still trying to enjoy the ride"

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  (518): currently working on a look that screams, "I'm dead inside, but still trying to enjoy the ride" http://tfl.nu/puls
  Replies (1) Good night (341) Bad night (115)
• Favorite

  (305): View more from Florida

  I feel as though my head has drastically changed shape

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  (305): I feel as though my head has drastically changed shape http://tfl.nu/rt3f
  Replies (2) Good night (127) Bad night (186)
• Favorite

  (410): View more from Maryland

  He called me in the middle of the night to ask my shoe size. Apparently big feet would make me an unsatisfactory third for the threesome.

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  (410): He called me in the middle of the night to ask my shoe size. Apparently big feet would make me an unsatisfactory third for the threesome. http://tfl.nu/ga5n
  Replies (2) Good night (53) Bad night (119)

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