apparently vodka and oj turns green when you throw it up
basic color theory
I'm having a chugging contest on the streetcar. The driver is judging.
Plus someone just passed me a joint through the window. BEST STREETCAR RIDE EVER
im kinda looking forward to winter break. ive been away from home for so long i think i can trick my vagina into thinking that these arent the same people ive been hooking up with since high school...
They're watching TV in bed. The Golden Girls to be exact. Aaaand I just heard them singing along with the theme song. I love living with gays.
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Nothing like hearing a USA chant while getting head. God bless America.
I'm not sure...it could be the pasta I ate from her sink, the dominoes, or just the alcohol. Or a wicked combination of all 3.
Dude she has starbursts in her sports bra. I feel like this is counter productive.
I'm in the "I'd rather have Carbs than Dick phase" part of my Life right now. YOU tell me how much Skinny Sex I'm having.
I don't remember much of half-time. I do remember climbing onto the roof of the fraternity and telling people I was going to stargaze in French.
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I just ate powdered extacy out of my wallet. I think I might have for a second of my reasonable life been on your level.
I'm dealing with this like an adult, cupcakes and beer.
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
My condoms might be a little big for you but hey, a big sweater is better than no sweater at all when it's cold right?
No piss test, hell yeah
FALSE ALARM. PISS TEST. I NEED YOUR PISS.
Elliott peed on my floor and slept in it lol that's a one line description.