Maybe my heart is located in my vagina
And when I say "complete whore" I mean I could possibly make a shameful profit by wearing this.
I bet you think you're really funny for switching my line of coke with a line of protein powder.
It was like riding a jackhammer on a train during an earthquake. THAT amazing.
this kid woke up on our hotel floor and doesnt know how he got here
on my way back.. me and that kid will be great friends
he was holding his dick in one hand and my boob in the other and i looked down and thought, this is my life
It's such a good feeling to send those "I'm not in jail" texts on Sunday morning
you flashed my boyfriend last night so i tackled you to the floor. you may be a bit sore.
Something's wrong. My throat is definitely not in it's normal spot. Way too low.
and it seems i've caught your masturbating bug. thanks.
Overslept. So hungover. Apparently texting the first person in my contact list the time I would like to wake up is not how the alarm clock in my phone actually works.
He better be a good lay, these underwear cost $50.
I went to smoke a bowl and realized that my lighter is out and there's still frozen blueberries in my bong... I need to reevaluate my life...
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
I JUST NEEDED TO TELL YOU I JUST FUCKED TWO BOYS IN THE SPAN OF LIKE THREE HOURS AND ONE OF THEM WAS MY SISTERS PROM DATE FROM HIGH SCHOOL IM LOWKEY BOTH PROUD AND ASHAMED
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