my ultimate dream in life is to have sperm so powerful that it will rival that of jim bob duggar.
i'm having a wet tshirt contest with myself and yet i'm still losing
I mean, it really isn't YOUR car until you have sex in it.
Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
I just realized his fb pic was taken in a public bathroom.
he said no sex till date three. i said the party was one, mcdonalds two and that i would take him with me to buy cigs for date three.
After Sake bombs he tried to puke into an alluminum beer bottle and shot vomit streaks in a perfect V out the sides of his mouth and hit BOTH girls he had bought drinks for that night. He was like an Icon of Cock-blocking yourself.
Its name is Richard. And I think he formally introduced us.
Of all the shitty people we associated with, you should be happy that I'm the one fucking your cousin. Sorry.
Did you get any last night. I need to track my forever aloneness
Im going to make a sandwich and see if my books came from amazon. I cant believe two years ago i was dating eight guys and teaching russian exchange students how to do shots.
How the fuck do you get a noise complaint filed against you at 9:30am on a fucking Tuesday?
Ur dad just showed me a tit pic he got omf
sorry for running off in the middle of that heart to heart. free food.
But seriously, I love having sex with you and simultaneously know I never wanna date you.
Randomize
