Heyy I kind of wanted to apologize and excuse myself for last night. I feel like that was a little much. I just met you. That's why I don't like tequila. Haha
my mom walked in on my vaccuming.......i wasnt vaccumming
Awkward medical moment of the day: A very obese girl with a disorder that literally makes her hit herself punched herself in the face. Literally. While screaming 'MCDONALDS MONEY'. Right. Beside. Me.
Then I opened the closet and then i found the babies
This got awkward about two "Oh yeah"s ago.
It's a shame that I don't know his last name. Actually, it's an ever bigger shame that I don't know his first name
I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
ask me if i forgot to go to a midterm today
I have bruises covered in glitter and someone just asked me if I realized I'm bleeding from both ears. This is awkward.
Im thinking about quitting weed for my dog
Okay. So my choices are the sleeping Guy who looks about twelve and a man that looks like he was the original sandman. Im gonna need a beer for this......
She has this wild look other eyes like she wouldn't be afraid to commit a felony.
I just matched the dude who's car I rear ended 2 years ago on tinder. I don't think he remembers.
My night has consisted of googling cat penises and creating a Tinder profile.
And by not handle it I mean it makes me want to sit on his face
Randomize
