You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
i am pregamming alone in my car. scale of 1-10 how alcoholic is that
im pretty sure thats an 11
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
They seriously just ended our alcohol presentation by giving us beer cozies. I love college.
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
The claw marks on my back are healing nicely. Just thought you should know.
My bad. Next time I'll wear mittens.
you dont know your limits until you wake up with a black eye and a bruised rib and find out you got ran over by a bicycle last night
I made a joke about The Hemingway being a really boring sex position where you blandly describe all the action and then kill yourself after you orgasm. He stopped responding. I've GOT to stop talking to everyone like they're you.
I'm having a funeral for my vibrator. Please be there. I need your dick for support.
If there was a category for "most likely to end up a serial killer" in your high school yearbook then I'm sure you would have won it
I'm definitely single now but she stole my mailbox
I think I should've done my makeup before I took the acid. Because now I just feel silly looking at myself in the mirror
no real plans this weekend. trying to derail the alcohol induced fucking hell train I've been riding for the past three weeks.
Somebody put William Shatner singing Bohemian Rhapsody on the jukebox, and the whole bar is about to riot.
Sorry I missed your birthday party. I caught a dick and rode it to O-Town
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