worst hand job ever. my dick is about as raw as that sushi your mom wanted me to try.
Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
You American Chicks are so confusing....1 day you are on my nuts next day you be trippin
Dude its not just American chicks...a small penis is the same in every language
Beer is about to convince me to do something really stupid.
I mean what are real friends for if they won't hold down your wedding dress to allow for a keg stand
Thanks for not stopping me when I decided to call my mom at 2 in the morning to ask her where I was born
yo your bro wants to know what time he got home and were you hosing him off
She told me I made the cut, and to write my name and number on the white board by the door. I was the 7th number down.
I just heard your voicemail. Glad you like my dick and think I'm cool
His chest is so hairy i want to pet it with my nipples.
Concept: I never actually flirt with anyone, I'm just a bitch and some people find it endearing
I miss my teeeeeeeeth. They're in a bag in my hand.
You texted him 17 times. Asking for him back and sending random pictures of Jimmy Buffett. He didn't answer.
I cannot believe I accepted his penis into my body.
I was not drunk enough for that final.
Randomize
