dont quote avril lavinge. im to drunk.
I have found the one flaw to the great pride I took as a guy to not have to sit down to pee...having to sneeze while peeing.
As far as classy things to do in front of your ex go, throwing up on your own shirt is not one of them.
I'm at the house listening to vengaboys alone. Please come home.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My uncles bleeding, my brother has a black eye and my moms topless in the pool... How was your family cookout?
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
Dont ask, hes out back rolling around in the yard freaking out. literally just had a 15 minute conversation, only word i could make out was "yellow"
I woke up with a fake mustache stuck to my chest and I can't even hold down water.
Your message cut off at "shit on the floor". Your life is incredible.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Monday is now my bitch. I just did 20 naked push ups on the bar for $20
That reminds me of the morning I woke up on the sidewalk covered in chicken wings
Why were you doing tequila shots out of Boston Pizza dip containers?
As a gift to myself for being so awesome at being single, I'm going to buy a vibrator
I WANT GRASS AND TREES NOT SOMEONE SWINGING A SWORD AROUND
I'm reading fall out boy fanfic. What has my life come to.
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