so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
even in the morning, she still thinks my british accent is real.
Dude I was fucking my girl on the couch and her dog came up and licked my balls. Does that mean we just had a threesome?
OMG. if college stays like this, theres no way i wont be pregnant by first semester
Every single time I start thinking that we shouldn't have done that to him, I think of his ballsack in our passed out faces. No sympathy.
plus shes a stripper, ive been with strippers, if you fuck this up your penis will never forgive you
Just puked up hair, tacos and vodka. Hello Memorial Day weekend.
Remember that time we became friends because I shotgunned a Tall Boy in your bathroom?
Those memories are both hazy and awesome.
On a lighter note, the guy I gave a lap dance to then fell asleep on his crotch just facebook friend requested me..
Reading old FB posts. Why did I ever stop drinking?
Did your surprise acid trip turn out well?
We broke into her grandpa's pool at 2 am and I held my underwear out the window on the way home.
Did I, at any point last night, say I was dying?
I saved a sauce packet from taco bell that said "Free me" to use in my next break up.
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
Randomize
