Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
I don't think ill make it tonight the floor wont let me walk
Is it a bad that I spent my 5 year anniversary with my husband texting my ex boyfriend?
we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
For the record, a bath beer is far superior to a shower beer...
Peter invited his little brother to smoke with us and he is trying so hard to pretend he's done it before. When he saw the weed he was like "hell yeah!" and everyone got completely silent and just looked at him
I'm drinking too much free beer
Thats like saying one owns too many kittens. It's not possible.
Last time I sleep with a guy with a penchant to fragrance his dick. Every time I sit to pee, I get a whiff of Axe body spray.
Also, I'm going to TRY and be casual this weekend, but really, we need to be serious about equally dividing our time between party and bullshit.
I remember us getting kicked out of the bar, but neither of us know why. We woke up next to chicken bones on a plate with spoons, and my car has mud all over it including places where feet shouldn't be, like the speakers on the car door.
Just walked in and got handed a drink. Good service
Do we have to do this party tonight? I'm worried my bed will miss me...
Hurricane Harvey ruined my dick appt. WTF?!
on the bright side i found your panties and the lid to the nutella
Had a dick customer and the words "eat my ass" slipped out. He proceeded to lick his lips and say present it. I think it's time I quit.
Randomize
