its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
I'm like 99% sure I made out with Kevin Spacey last night. Not good.
I just realized last night I drunk-bought a flight to Florida for this weekend...kinda torn between the price and the potential of awesomeness
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
omg dinner turned into a foam party this is weiriiid
Yes, that was ME getting carried out of the club singing 'i believe i can fly'
I left boob prints on the hood of his car. Something to remember me by.
Well I don't know him that well so I don't think I can give advice. You should make him a cake. Or have sex with him.
That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
I wouldn't be surprised. You and I have basically synced up our brain chemistry by doing drugs together in the same way that two girls would sync their menstrual cycles by sharing a house.
You know you're baked when you feel your throat closing up from an allergic reaction to the pecans in the cookie you're eating but you keep eating the damn cookie.
Happiness is having a 12 hour day thinking that there are only 2 beers in the fridge when you get home, but then finding 8. Fuck you Monday, this week I won.
Who put the fucking tampon in my Mike's hard lemonade?
I called him the wrong name all night, yet I still got a ride home from the party and hooked up with the guy. I'm irresistible.
the gnome is staring at me and the pineapple is wearing shorts. I don't want to do this anymore.
Randomize
