Do you understand how much easier life would be if fannypacks were normal
I didnt realize my nipple ring fell out until he coughed it up.
Come help me clean. I know we won't be getting our security deposit back...but I would like to move out with our dignity.
Lol. No. We cannot eat chicken while we have sex. No.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm concerned I'll look like a hooker on new years eve in this outfit
There are different standards on new years eve. To look like a hooker you literally need to be giving a guy head on the street while he's handing you cash.
He rode a broom down the stairs while we were mattress surfing. Naked. Buck ass naked. WTF
I was barred out and drunk as fuck locked out at 3am in my Indian costume. It was literally freezing outside. I laid down on the concrete and made a bonfire with dry leaves. Then proceeded to ask.the.bonfire nicely to "please dont go out". Drunk me went strait up survival mode.
I think I accidentally agreed to be someone's surrogate
I realize designer coke was a douchey thing to say but the point of the story is I did bath salts
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
sooo the guy I beat last night in strip pong is the manager's husband at my new job...
She just started crying. With my dick still inside her. Something about her grandpa.
Well, at least you look pretty when you're disgusted
im having flashbacks to my time in a waffle cult composed of 9 to 14 year olds
i woke up half naked on someone's pool lounge chair in a house that i don't know, with someone's phone number scrawled on my stomach. why do i hang out with you again??
You just listed two reasons.
I'm hung over and my mom made me go to church. I feel like such a sinner.
I need an aspirin and some dignity.
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