im pretty sure there are laws against slapping prostitutes
i'm pretty sure there are laws against prostitutes.
yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
My parents just told me I first got drunk when I was 4. Successsssssss
she told me she sucks everyone's dick but mine because mine is too big and "hard to suck" i need to reevaluate the girls i fall in love with.
I've never heard a "this is the reason why i dont suck your cock" explanation go in that direction
At 4am he sent "uree asss ize anmazin"
i am way too old to be getting fingered at work
I thought your voice was coming from the walls. I've never been so relieved to find you naked in a closet
I want to break his glasses with my pelvis.
Worst part of blacking out... Waking up and having to do the teeth check
Just got a message on OkCupid from a 20-year-old who has "Momma's Boy" tattoed across his chest and thinks the earth is bigger than the sun.
Drunk texting with my high school teacher. This hurricane is bringing out the best in everyone!
You left wolverine marks
I'm somewhere between sorry and proud
If I show up to the mall alone looking like I do to purchase a vibrator and some Japanese food, I would judge me too.
He was really cute! And I know but it's just like getting my fix ya know? He's basically a human vibrator.
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