no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
she gave me a schnouzer then wanted to kiss while we were having sex...i had to puppy slap her nose. pick me up out front.
either my laughing turned him on, or he wanted to shut me up. either way, i dont care. it was amazing.
best googles of the semester: toe fucking, purpose of two nostrils, human tail. with pictures
23 Crazy Psychological Tricks You Have To Try on Someone RIGHT NOW
i just woke up to a text from him apologizing for making me eat a full lemon
he locked me out then poked me with a fork when i tried to get in through the window
Hovering on the line between her being fuckable and me being too drunk to fuck. Life's juggling act in progress here.
Tried to dry my shoes in the oven last night.
It feels like I'm breathing out my heart and it spreads through my limbs to my fingertips.
These 25 People Forgave their Significant Others for Saying Stupid Things
He put crushed up bacon in the joint and now we're listening to the Matilda soundtrack I have no idea what's going on
So much rum. So many feels.
We christened the whole apartment and fucked on the balcony. It was amazing. I'm 100% sure downtown heard me climax. Now we can unpack.
With a butt like mine I'll never have to pay for Netflix again.
I even put my vibrators back in the bedroom instead of the coffee table. If that's not growing up then I don't know what is.
She used to be cute, back when we were young.
Oh well, so were platform jellies. Shit changes.
Randomize
