Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
Last night was so much fun. i kept trying to lick everyone
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
Had sex to a Lionel Richie song. I have a feeling I was conceived to it. Finally reached full circle.
Woke up on the kitchen floor cuddling with the dummy we made of you. Hope your internship is going well.
i swear, about 40% of my drunken life is spent having sex with him.
I cannot believe I said bareback movement...
Why not. Its my b-day, you're in town, I'm in town, bars are in town, and alcohol is in town. I don't see anything not good about those things.
I HAVE A BLACK EYE FROM A DILDO!! IM GETTING MARRIED TOMORROW! THIS IS NOT A MISSUNDERSTANDING!
how the hell were we supposed to out run the cops in a bus?
In case you were wondering how drunk I was last night, there was an unopened slim Jim in front of my door and I ate it.
The little girl I'm babysitting is having a tea party, the water and chips she's passing out are doing wonders for my hangover.
Wait, cocaine is okay but tanning isn't?
i'm extremely hungover on the ski bus and the driver is playing abba. this. is. not. okay.
Randomize
