Take a Tylenol with a HUGE glass of water before you pass out, you'll thank me in the morning.
i dony have tylonal but i had a snickers and popcorn and a bottle of water and i am.. brushing my teeth!
if i wake up one more time on my porch im gonna start considering myself homeless
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
or how I got to mom's but there is vomit on my shoes. I never thought i'd be recapping with her.
the kid next to me in training is drinking sangria. its 9am here in case you couldnt calculate. its going to be a good year.
Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be
She said her hobbies include bangin guys on one night stands and then sending them facebook relationship requests the next morning just to freak em out
When we asked you how you got there you replied in all seriousness, "rode my legs"
Okay throwing up in my mouth a little = time to go home
You can't spell "party" without "RA."
You know what else you can't spell it without? "Gonna get fired."
You should make a checklist to ensure they are quality material. Here's mine: wearing shoes, not drunk, very hot, has teeth, speaks english. You never know
I just connected with one of your drug dealers on LinkedIn.
Only you would get a side of potential vagina with your sandwich
He drove me to my therapist appointment because I was too drunk to drive. Total keeper.
Randomize
