the cure to his relationship is in or around my vagina.
i barely touched his dick and all of a sudden he yells, "BONER!"
I woke up with ten beers in my bag that hoarded at the party last night. Rally? Its five somewhere.
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
At least my fat-chick-ratio has not been that bad this semester ...
You are not about to raise that baby deer, you can BARELY raise yourself... Return it to it's mom now.
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
You rubbed your penis on my leg and said "people have paid for this kind of action"
My cell phone fell out of my shirt pocket while tying my shoe on an escalator....which was followed by me being accused of trying to sneak an upskirt photo and being violently shoved down the top of the escalator. How's YOUR day?
You know you can't live off of vodka and pizza rolls forever
I'VE ALREADY MADE MY CHOICE
Would you still love me if my nipple fell off?
Right now you and beer are my only friends.
I don't want to go back to the suburbs. Being drunk in public isn't ok and theres too many children. Don't make me.
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
Randomize
