I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
I cannot remember December 31 for the past 3 years. it might as well not even exist on my calendar anymore
i just had to google what happens if your dog eats your nuva ring
On my way home I stopped at target and bought beer and galoshes. I am a planner.
When she was dating that guy she told me If they broke up, I would receive a call and no matter what I was doing I'd have to go over a fuck her. It's like being an EMT for sex.
Just took a shot of tequila with a random guy at the supermarket. Happy cinco de fourth.
I'll do a soapy photo shoot for you in the shower. No loofas, though. Once you get one of those caught in your nipple ring, you never go back.
How can someone be so bad at fingering? It's such a simple concept
he has a party story that rivals our "PTSD- soldier-with-a-knife" party story. I'm pretty sure this is part of some prophecy.
Question for you. Do you want to go out somewhere or do you want to have sloppy joes at my house? That's not a euphemism for anything; I actually have stuff to make sloppy joes
Lol yeah. Because I just woke him up to blow him for being hot.
You threw up with such class too! Tiara and all.
I just want a guy who will spank me, fuck me, then take me to my office xmas party. I'd that too much to ask?
I’m doing tequila shots with lesbians. This isn’t how I planned my night but I’m not complaining
we cut you off when you started chasing with your slim fast shake
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