He disabled his match.com account in front of me
and when i put it inside her she yelled "welcome aboard!"
He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
you have to choose: penises or morals?
Whenever I said your name you screamed polo and did another shot.
Do you know how hard it is to get cum out of a straw hat!?
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
I'm just going to say , cocktail races are not for a Wednesday night maybe not even a Friday type of deal
He simply fell in the fire, rolled out and continued to finish his bottle of vodka. Everyone else instantly sobered up just watching it.
Summer bikini season begins today. I hereby declare the commencement of the 2013 HUNT FOR CUNT.
You gave him that scrunchie you made and called it your "sex offering".
I think I sold my soul to a dominatrix last night.
That's right. I just LL Cool J'ed you up in this bitch. Zero fucks.
When I get off work and you're not around to hang out with all I do is lay around in my underwear and eat potatoes.
you woke up this morning in a laundry basket, only wearing rainboots.
Randomize
