That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
chris hansen is no longer pursuing child predators.let's celebrate
i'll bring the hard lemonade and lube
Ahhh... Adderall running out my nose in the shower really brings back memories.
Going to get tested monday. You're coming with. Bonding time, slut style.
Before I left in the morning I deleted her purity ring app off her iPod, I figured it would save her the shame
We started playin just the tip, then shit got crazy
I don't think everyone found it as funny as I did... Nothing says "Party's Over" like the sound of a pump action shotgun.
You are NEVER going to guess whose penis was JUST in my mouth!!!
I'll give you a hint, we ate paste with him in kindergarten.
He got violent drunk so we have to untie him in the morning. He's in your basement and you're out of electrical tape. Don't forget because I will.
...Saturday night. Get your dick ready. We are going to go nuts. I want to have sex fucking everywhere.
He came over and said its legs day so put them in the air! Fucked me for 30 minutes and said he had dinner reservations to go to. Well i just ran into him and his friends hammered at Taco Bell
At least I got to make out with you a little before you proposed.
You were naked too, so it cancels out. We're straight.
he had a beard, sexy nerd glasses and kept referring to his penis as 'this dick' its like jesus was saving my perfect match for my prime
How do you confess that you've had phone sex with your fiancé's brother's ex-girlfriend's new guy she's dating who has also slept with your best friend?
Randomize
