Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
His facebook profile says he's interested in men, but i'm choosing to ignore that
She just sent me a picture of a heart. I need to stop fucking freshman...
she just announced that once she was paid to deep throat a light saber with a mint flavored condom on it. i'm speechless.
He literally didn't stop until I lost count of how many times he made me orgasm. It took three hours.
I've come to realize that after waking up this morning for work no one wins in bar dice.
I mean, I know going to rehab probably didn't make her a lesbian, but I can always hope
So much beer in the passenger seat the seatbelt light is blinking
i think maybe i'll just not watch it. i'd rather not think of you as a magical transforming set of dick holes.
GLITTER SLIP N SLIDE MUTHAFUCKAH~
BECKY! ITS ANDY FROM LAST NIGHT WITH THE PILL
Andy, Sorry you have the wrong number. But good luck with Becky!
It's like when your main girl and your side girl start having their period in the same week
You are the most depressed sports fan I know
I tried to break it off with the married one. He offered to pay off my car.
The side bitch struggle is real.
Though I don't usually want to turn down ladies who want to liquify my clothing with their eyes, I made an exception.
Congratulations! We have a period
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