I just had to explain to the pharmacy cashier that the Plan B and thank you notes I was buying were not related.
I can't belive they dont sell booze Sunday mornings. I mean some of us have to work
You act like this is the first time I literally thought I was invisible.
I feel like jumping into a breast pit right now. Like the old school ball pits at mcdonalds.
Power went out. She lit a candle and gave me head. Made some pretty impressive candlelight cocksucking shadowpuppets. Must be what porn was like in olden times.
It's his sex noise. "I'm gonna cu-THE LORD IS MY SHEPARD AND I SHALL NOT WANT"
You just kept screaming "PLEASE YELL CORNDOG AT HIM. PLEASE. CORNDOG."
I lost the back to your old name tag last night in a girls shirt. It got me a view of some titties though, I guess in some way you're still doing your brotherly deeds
also, am i correct in guessing that advertising the size of my hypothetical penis is a turnoff to him?
No it was fine, I've just never seen that many people eat dog food
I need a moral compass that doesn't always point to dick
I SWEAR TO ALL THAT IS HOLY I HAVE NEVER WIPED MY GENITALIA ON ANY TYPE OF EMERGENCY RESPONSE VEHICLE!!
Oh the best part of having sex with him was that he made me a smoothie after
I can tell that I'm high when listening to celine dion becomes such a life changing experience
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
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