Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
well that one time I was being a total idiot trying to see how much I could drink. turns out 22 shots is too much. surprise surprise! ambulance party!
we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
dude, boobs are like the porridge in goldylocks
this is no time to have dignity 4/20 is coming
that's like... drinking popov and saying its the worlds best vodka. you gotta try some others first. THERE SHOULD BE A MISS AMERICA PAGEANT. but like, mr penis. and they can do tricks and make unintelligent remarks and wear sparkly condoms.
How's your threesome situation going?
Optimistic
Hey, umm this is awkward but I want to apologize in case you find gum in your pubes. Not sure if I swallowed it or spit it out. It's all a blur.
We tried the hang n bang, remember? You ruined it by crying and telling me you loved me while blowing me.
I want you to know that the guy who peed in your bed got fat.
Yeah no problem. What are blow job angels for anyways
I've literally exhausted all the videos on pornhub. It took like 4 years, but I've done it. I did that quicker than I finished college
drinks after work?
that question mark offends me.
Got electrocuted a second ago, is it weird that I have a boner?
But we have bathrooms and they dont
Randomize
