if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
his penis is like a homeless cat. ever since I've satisfied him he keeps showing up on my doorstep ask for more.
and she was petting her beer can
I know we didn't hook up because i was still wearing my fanny pack in the morning
Yelling drunk tank or bust at a cop, not a good idea
we need to find an occasion to wear tutus
He literally sends me dick pictures, EVERY DAY. SEVERAL DIFFERENT ANGLES ..it's like I GET THE POINT.
He used the phrase "no problemo" in a sext. It's over.
I was just crying my tits off and he was just sitting there listening. I was an open book of embarrassing life stories.
Wine is not your friend.
It's ok, I like adventure. Just ask my vagina.
In two separate occurrences, I could have avoided getting my heart broken, and chlamydia, all with a left swipe.
lets go to sea world and you can just hit on every guy in a wetsuit until you get lucky
I named my Roomba after my pot dealer. I have a problem, don't i?
I gave up great shower sex to be here so don't say I never did anything for our friendship.
I told him no rough stuff and he immediately bit my ass. Who the fuck does that?
Randomize
