Def gonna have stinky sex sometime soon. GOT TO! she has eligible friends for you, as well.
I'm not conventionally pretty...I'm just crazy
no one is going to fuck you in a field of bunnies
I hope as the only other living being in this apartment you can explain to me why the toilet was full of cheerios this morning.
he built a boat made of joints. holyyy shit
I did nothing besides stay sober all night, I walked home to find max naked knocking cups off the counter with his cock lol
No. I'm too high for this. I gotta focus my mind for my future Hooter's interview
You were running around waving the flier in everyone's face and thats how we ended up in a church eating free breakfast tacos at 3 am
I don't want to jinx anything but I may have found the one.
Cat or human?
Human
Who knew I could feel anymore shameful at the bar than i usually do...I think my bartender recognizes me from the walk of shame out of his house after i hooked up with his son yesterday
Our drunk hook up was interrupted by the delivery guy. When he came back to my room we ate the gyros and went back to sex like we didn't take a lunch break.
Video footage says last night I reincarnated as stripper Shania Twain... Man, I feel like a (slutty) woman.
He's perfect in every other way. Is buying him a cockring too forward or just honest?
I had mediocre parking lot sex last night so the night wasn't a complete bust.
In case you're wondering... Yes walmart will judge you for buying vodka and pickles at 645am.
Randomize
