Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
We banged through her entire lady gaga playlist. I can die happy now
It's only slutty when someone else does it. It's okay if it's us though
I knew it was time to leave Waffle House when you started singing "What's Your Fantasy" to your hash browns.
Is waterboarding an exceptable way of getting sober?
you know I love you but I need to see your friends tits
and i'm going to kill you for what you did to my nipples last night. of course i want to hang out
This is going to be the time I got green body paint on Chris' ceiling all over again...
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
Did you really just call a picture of your erect penis art?
I just walked out of the side door of the bar to come in the front door so no one would know I've been here drinking before our work meeting.
Last night I watered my lawn and smoked a joint then cooked a steak. I'm really killing this adulthood thing.
THIS IS SO HOT. BYE PANTIES.
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
Right now I'm laying face down on my carpet in my living room in the darkness sending work emails from my phone.
It's a glamorous life.
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