Brogan sounds similar to Bridget...sorta.
Every girl's name is automatically translated to "Baby/Milk Carrier" in my brai
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
So... 5th graders can't whisper for shit, but apparently I have an awesome rack.
Haha. Niice.
Yeah, I didn't know whether to be shocked or flattered.
both.
He called himself excalibur. Thats all I remember.
I already have one guy that I have regrettable sex with. I don't need another.
Got robbed by knifepoint. Then got sympathy Bj. I might have to walk down Austin ave drunk every weekend
can we get vodka so I have an excuse for being an emotional wreck
You told her to step on the scale because you had whiskey goggles, and scales don't lie.
I still smell like men's body wash from that drunken shower I took at that stranger's home last night.
I got with him in my watermelon costume so ya you owe me $1
The quality of my porn watching experience has significantly declined. Thanks shattered iphone screen
This chick walked up to me in the bar and started making out with me, then grabbed my drink while I wasn't looking and walked off.
I would like to make it known to all of you that my penis is official retired, but it thanks you for the countless years of service you provided
it was a 'fall asleep on the bathroom floor after puking bc the cold tile is legit more comfortable than your bed' kind of night.
Randomize
