it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
i feel like after you turn 30 you aren't supposed to black out anymore
9 of the 12 girls i had sex with in college are on facebook
it was an ugly road back then. i'm sure time hasn't been friendly.
Apparently the cops have a video of me singing bob seger "Night moves".
I've been timing it. He's been showering alone for 33 minutes. 4 minutes ago, he said "truth or dare." haven't heard anything since.
And you were like "stop making pop tarts, lil bowow" as you grabbed the pop tarts from your ex and consumed them. Teach me your ways.
Just purchased ketchup, body wash, and lube. Hope you're ready for the post-memorial-day-cookout-shower-anal.
Yes. We drank 3/4 of a handle of vodka, fried and ate a 3lb package of bacon, I tackled the neighbors snowman, made snow angels in our underwear, and then fucked all night. Christmas success.
I'm not really sure if I peed the bed last night or if the cat was trying to get back at me for using her litter box last weekend
I'm actually drinking gin and juice out of a floridas natural carton...so if that has any indication of how I'm doing
He sent me a picture of him trying to push his cock into a Gatorade bottle. I dont know if I'm impressed it didn't fit and disgusted that he sent me something so vile.
Just sucked some sandy dick on a boardwalk & now I'm at a family reunion hbu
Best day ever, my junk is bigger than Kate Uptons boyfriends. Yay for Fappening day!
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
Accidentally searched up "pizza pasties" instead of "pizza pastries". I was not disappointed.
Randomize