Outside the community dumpsters: beer bottles and a carton of orange juice. Looks like we were here.
It got a little outta hand when you wanted to do body shots on the table.. at Dennys.. at 4 AM.. with lemonade
You tried to get me to kick my booty call out at 3am by tempting me with a trip to ihop
PSA: Morning booty calls are no longer accepted after the hours of 6am when I've been drinking or before 11am when I have not. Your cooperation is appreciated.
Don't make it weird, I don't think about you when I'm climaxing, it's just that I see you rooting me on.
I woke up surrounded by goldfish. Thank God my laptop was here too. Now I don't have to leave my bed all day.
being single and having a boyfriend 300 miles away is eerily similar. never skipped a beat eating hot wings in my bed with no pants or masturbating every day.
Clothes make me feel like a responsible adult and that's just not something I'm ready to handle.
we need to make pact to not cut each other's hair on coke and whiskey nights.
While I agree, I dont think thats realistically possible
My memory of last night is a delicious blur of tits, ass, and alcohol.
We just had sex on an abandoned logging road while wearing snow shoes. God bless Montana boys.
I'm eating pizza in the bathtub
PokemonGo as navigation to get some at 5:13 AM. Life choices, yo.
Ugh. My life is a never ending cycle of bad decisions and taquitos.
just realized we fucked to the ultimate disney playlist last night. hakuna matata.
Randomize
