he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
He said he's was gunna give me some pain meds. I'm not sure what they are but I just gave him a thumbs up
Reason #57 I am going to fail the bar... it's Tuesday and i'm drunk at Toy Story 3.
She told me to wait on the sofa while she freshened up. She's been in the bathroom for an hour. I have a bad feeling about this.
The investigator asked if we were sharing a pitcher of margaritas. I corrected him and explained that we each had our own.
There seems no grander way to celebrate 420 than to smoke atop a mountain peak.
At least I look tastefully trashed. My nipples are hidden and I'm standing up.
Def just hooked up with my brother's senior prom date in his bed. Does that make me the worst brother ever?
I think all the stress in my life right now can be directly correlated with never winning a game of Bop It as a child.
I like making it seem like it's at least a little bit difficult to hook up with me
I realize designer coke was a douchey thing to say but the point of the story is I did bath salts
'valentine' just autocorrected to 'cake robe' in my phone
I think that summarizes my life up pretty accurately
Some guy walking down the sidewalk just looked at me and said "hey it's the world champ". How drunk was I on Friday...?
I might be a bit late, couldn't find my pants and had to go to the police station. Unrelated
Randomize
