It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
I'm watching Intervention to get pumped up for tonight
I just learned that your liver regrows itself every 2 months. Best news I've heard all week.
my dad is going to jail this weekend
where are we going to get our weed from?
Even though I wasn't drunk last night, I peed in the sink just so I could keep my record going
This year I'm going to try NOT getting arrested. I think the 30th birthday is the cutoff for calling Mom to bail me out.
Tonight when I'm getting a bj from a stripper I'm gonna imagine it's you bobbing down there
who was wearing the fake mustache? I just found one in my cleavage
she's unstoppable after she starts doing shots and yelling NANNER
It's a journey
And the destination is his penis?
Precisely.
That's why you bone lesbian cage fighters and 45 year olds. To make life less boring.
but how can he casually chat with my father 8 hours after asking me if i'm a screamer
I guess what I'm trying to get to is that my dog sneezed on my dick earlier and its really taken the joy out of my evening.
...hi
YOU SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF YOURSELF
Ok cool I was afraid you'd never speak to me again. I can work with this.
The guy i took home was a circus freak. He jerked off 3 times in front me after we had sex. And he came every time.
Randomize
