is it sad that i can masturbate and get my big O just from thinking about a Tiffany engagement ring?
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
My dad just questioned my drinking habits... Clearly he doesn't know what kind of college education he's paying for
Your braces fetish is going to end up biting you in the dick.
Valium party in the driveway. Attendance: 1. Don't make me do this alone.
He ran five blocks just to watch me and my best friend make out. I think he's a keeper.
Just found out my 21st birthday is on a Wednesday. The possibilities are cheap, as well as endless.
Please make the clown in the corner stop judging me. I mean he's the one with paint on his face. I don't need him judge judying me.
I feel like despite his sleaziness I could be friends with this man. he just sent me a picture of his dog's balls.
I miss you too. And it was nice meeting your brother while I was mounting you
I just got my beard fondled by a drunk chick outside the venue. I feel slightly violated. And I think her boyfriend wanted to fight me.
Her hotness level dropped from an 8 to a 2 as soon as I walked into her place. It REEKED of cat piss and there was no litter box and NO CATS.
We're friends with benifits... The benifits being I'm fucking her boyfriend
My brain is a dvd screensaver and I'm allowed to have a good thought when it hits the corner
Oral sex and brunch. The perfect sunday morning.
Randomize
